When should I get married?

The decision to marry is one of great importance. How early should this decision be made? How early is too early? And everythign else about marriage

At what age should a man get married?

Before he reaches 20
6
12%
Between 20 and 25
38
73%
After 25
8
15%
 
Total votes: 52
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Tayyaba
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Postby Tayyaba » 11 Feb 2007, 21:47

Khayli Mamnun Muntazir .. this has really taught me allot esp the part why cant we get married during the day and you answered my question. AHSANT BROTHER.

and Good luck for your exams. :)
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Postby Muntazir » 12 Feb 2007, 14:09

Bismillahir Rahmaanir Rahim

As Salaamu 'aleykum

A girl with a wheaty complexion

A girl with a broad forehead and

A girl with heavy hips

Sorry for the typing mistake. I guess I over-loaded myself with stuff in my head.

Thanks

Allah Hafeez
Last edited by Muntazir on 12 Feb 2007, 15:26, edited 1 time in total.
as-Salaamu 'aleykum warahmatullah
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Postby Tayyaba » 12 Feb 2007, 15:05

As far as i know..its wheaty complexion and large hips.!
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Postby Muhammad » 23 Feb 2007, 21:45

it would be great if we could INCLUDE PARENTS in this forum..especially those who have daughters..
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Even Important!

Postby Muntazir » 24 Feb 2007, 20:08

Bismillahir Rahmaanir Rahim

As Salaamu 'aleykum

The most important for all the youths at this point is to change their behavior and personality.

This specially goes to all the boys at first. I have been hearing a lot of behavior corruption in our brothers. Not only hearing them, I have also seen them by my own eyes when I had my last visit in the last two weeks of the Holy month of Ramadhan last year. I mean, how do we expect soo much from our sisters when our brothers are not following what they are supposed to? I think they don't have any right to complain. This is a very serious matter that should be discussed with parents. And if this continues, it would bring a major distruction to our community.

Well, we should discuss this first and then start talking about marriage becasue according to our Holy prophet, marriage with such people is a distruction!

Thank you
as-Salaamu 'aleykum warahmatullah
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Re: Even Important!

Postby FatemaC » 16 Apr 2007, 08:36

Very true Muntazir!!!
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Postby Mehtaab » 24 Apr 2007, 23:18

salaams,

i ws gng thru the forum topics, n this caught my eye.. :)

i was wondering... does anyone knw wat shud be the right age gap
between the girl and the boy wanting to get married? is 2 yrs gap too little?
n 8 or 10yrs gap too much?
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Postby Zaheer » 25 Apr 2007, 07:30

Depends on ur parents suggestion or even the spouses suggestion !

it can be 1 week , 1 month 1 year or more as decided... :D
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Postby Muntazir Manji » 28 Apr 2007, 13:12

Actually i understand that islam recommends a 4-5 year gap. But then again it also depends on the circumstances. Sometimes an 8-10 year difference can be beneficial! Like Ayatullah khomeini was 28 and his wife at the time of marriage was 15! as per one source i read. So I guess it all depends on how the energy level of the two people compares!
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Postby qarrar » 28 Apr 2007, 14:12

Muntazir Manji wrote:Actually i understand that islam recommends a 4-5 year gap.


Would you be kind enough to provide a reference for this please :?:
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Postby kulsham » 28 Apr 2007, 15:05

can a woman marry a man who is 6 years younger than her?
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Postby Zaheer » 28 Apr 2007, 17:40

:roll: :roll:
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Postby Muntazir Manji » 28 Apr 2007, 19:05

1. Reference for the 4-5 year gap is Youth and Spouse Selection. forgotten the name of the author, but very common book available at tabligh store.

2. As per popular narration, the prophet (s) was 25 and Khadija (sa) 40 when they got married. Considering this gap, 6 years shouldn't be a problem. However, there is a possibility that Khadija (sa) was not that old! nevertheless, as long as the boy is baligh and sane, why should there be a problem!?

3. Is 2 years gap too little? I suppose again here it depends on how the two individuals compare!

just some 3 cent worth!
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Postby FatemaC » 29 Apr 2007, 01:59

I believe it should be atleast 4 years age difference.... but then its just upto the couples themselves
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Postby qarrar » 29 Apr 2007, 16:51

Muntazir Manji wrote:1. Reference for the 4-5 year gap is Youth and Spouse Selection. forgotten the name of the author, but very common book available at tabligh store.

The authors name is Ali Akbar Mazaheri but the point I am trying to deduce is that the gap you mentioned was authors view it has no endorsement from hadith or Quran. As you yourself mentioned popular narration states the Prophet (saw) was 25 and Bibi Khadija (as) 40 making it a 15 year gap in favour of Bibi Khadija. Imam Ali (as) was 14 according to some narrations and Bibi Fatema (as) 9 when they got married making it a 5 year difference in favour of the Imam. Four to six years mentioned by many in favour of a man is an arbitrary figure and we should look to spouse compatibility when taking such decisions not their age differences.
How does he, whose guardian is Allah, get perished? And how can he, who is being pursued by Allah, get salvation? (Imam Mohammad Taqi (as))

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