RECOMMENDED ACTS IN ISLAMIC MARRIAGE

The decision to marry is one of great importance. How early should this decision be made? How early is too early? And everythign else about marriage
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Reyhana
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RECOMMENDED ACTS IN ISLAMIC MARRIAGE

Postby Reyhana » 17 Feb 2012, 14:48

RECOMMENDED ACTS IN ISLAMIC MARRIAGE

It is narrated from the Prophet (s): “The doors of Heaven to mercy will be opened in four situations: when it rains; when a child looks kindly at his parent’s face; when the door of the Ka‘bah is opened; and when marriage (occurs).

Recommended Acts Before, During and After Nikaah
(Taken from the majlis recited by Zakira Kaneez-e- Zainab Lakdawala)

Before Nikaah:

 Once the wedding date is set, the very first invitation should be to the 12th Imam, pray 2 rakat namaz and recite dua-e-isteghasa asking him to attend and place his blessings and barakah in the wedding.

 14 days before the wedding, amaal of the 14 ma’sumeen should be done. Each day should be dedicated to one ma’sumeen, starting with day 1 for the Prophet and ending at day 14 (day of nikaah) with the 12th Imam. The amaal for each day involves reciting the salaah and ziyarah for each ma’sumeen, (from Mafatihul Jinan) and asking them for their blessings. It is highly recommended for the bride and groom to fast on these days as well.


 On the 14th day, in the morning, (which will be the nikaah day), the bride and the groom should perform ghusl and recite 2 rakaah salaah (in which one recites 100 times iyyaka na’abudu wa iyyaka nastaeen’’) and the dua of isteghasa for the 12th Imam and recite the tasbeeh of 12th Imam as below and ziyarat of 12th Imam :


 Tasbeeh of the 12th Imam: (this tasbeeh can also be recited when seeking for help through the 12th Imam in a difficult situation.


http://www.duas.org/SahifaMahdi/SMc7_04.gif

‘’O’ the horseman of Hijaz take me over, O’ Al-Mahdi, the father of all goods take me over, O’ the father of Al-Qasim take me over, take me over and don’t let me down because I am weak and distressed.’’

NOTE: Bride and groom should ask/call Imam with humility from the depths of their hearts to come and bless the marriage.




IMPORTANT POINT: The whole wedding period should start with a sharwate shaadi majlis in which you invite the Imam of the time. The fourth Imam had told Zohri that he would be present at the wedding of his child, if there was majlis of Imam Husayn.



WHEN BRIDE LEAVES HER FATHER’S HOUSE FOR THE NIKAAH:

This is a highly auspicious time as this is the time when she is leaving her father’s protection/shelter and is going to be under the protection/shelter of her husband to be,hence during this intermediate stage i.e after leaving her father’s house till the time nikaah is recited SHE IS THE GUEST OF ALMIGHTY ALLAH s.w.t !
This time is so blessed and auspicious for the bride and it’s much recommended for the bride to be in constant dhikr of Almighty.
As she is the guest of Allah swt Almighty grants her 3 things:
(1)Special doors of mercy are opened for her.
(2) Her face is filled with noor
(3)God places beneath her feet abundant blessings, as the dust beneath her feet has been said to have come from the arsh of Almighty as she has been his guest that is why the groom has to wash her feet and sprinkle the water on the corners of his house as 70,000 problems are removed with the blessings of this water and 70,000 blessings are given. SUBHANALLAH.

DURING NIKAAH :

 A highly auspicious time as doas are accepted during this time and the dhikr done during nikaah time has its effects on the bride and groom’s children to come .


 It is recommended for the bride to wear a khaak e shifaa tasbeeh, due to the benefits of khaak. During the nikaah, it is mustahab for the bride to listen to her nikaah and to recite the tasbeeh of the 12th Imam as mentioned above (khake shifaa tasbih should be used). The bride should be looking at the Holy Quran (surah Maryam or surah Yusuf).


 The bride must be engrossed in the dhikr of Allah when her nikaah is being recited and it is highly recommended for the guests to do the same. The doors of Allah’s mercy are open when nikaah is being recited.

 Just before the nikaah starts the mother of the bride and the groom should both stand up with khaak tasbeeh (even if it just for a few seconds) with full yakeen that the Imam of the time is present for the nikaah and pray for their children and recite the tasbih of Imame Zamana mentioned in the previous section.


NOTE: All the ladies present in the nikaah ceremony should be given tasbihs in their hands and requested to do any dhikr of Almighty as this dhikr will highly benefit the couple whose nikaah is being recited .

ALAS THIS PRECIOUS TIME IS LOST WHILE EVERYBODY IS ENVYING THE JEWELLERY AND DRESSES OF EACH OTHER AND GOSSIPING e.t.c EVEN THE BRIDES ARE MADE SO MUCH CONSCIOUS OF THEIR APPEARANCE THAT EVERY TIME THEIR CLOTHES ARE BEING ADJUSTED e.t.c. THE BRIDE’S AND GROOM’S MOTHER ARE BUSY WELCOMING GUESTS. HENCE THIS PRECIOUS OPPORTUNITY OF ABUNDANT BLESSINGS IS LOST!

 It is mustahab that Nikaah should be recited at evening time or after maghrib and not in daytime.


DURING RUKHSATI :

 At the time of rukhsati i.e when the bride is going to her husband’s house/sasural , the bride’s parents should hold their daughter’s right hand and recite 7 times verse 31 of sura 28[Al-Qasas) beginning and ending with durood/salwaat.
وَأَنْ أَلْقِ عَصَاكَ ۖ فَلَمَّا رَآهَا تَهْتَزُّ كَأَنَّهَا جَانٌّ وَلَّىٰ مُدْبِرًا وَلَمْ يُعَقِّبْ ۚ يَا مُوسَىٰ أَقْبِلْ وَلَا تَخَفْ ۖ إِنَّكَ مِنَ الْآمِنِينَ {31}
 [Shakir 28:31] And saying: Cast down you staff. So when he saw it in motion as if it were a serpent, he turned back retreating, and did not return. O Musa! come forward and fear not; surely you are of those who are secure;
(This amal will ensure peace/tranquility, honor/dignity and love for the bride in her husband’s house.)


 The Bride and those accompanying the bride to her husband’s place should be told to recite TAKBIR during the whole journey,as The Holy Prophet told his wives who were accompanying Bibi Fatema to Hzt Ali a.s house during her rukhsati to recite TAKBIR continuously till they reached Imam Ali’s house.

 The bride should recite takbir and tasbih of Bibi Fatema a.s, as 70,000 angels accompany the bride during her rukhsati.

 JOKING/TALKING/USELESS TALK e.t.c should be avoided.


RECOMMENDED ACT: ARRANGING WALIMA/THANKSGIVING FOOD:

What is Walima ?
Walima is thanksgiving food arranged by the groom’s side for thanking God for getting a wife, as she is God’s mercy/rehmat for the groom and his family. Also Allah s.w.t places barakah in the rizq of groom after the nikah. Hence the walima held after nikaah is totally the responsibility of groom and his family and its cost should be totally covered by the groom’s family and not by bride’s family.

REACHING THE GROOM”S HOUSE:

 The time when the bride enters the groom’s house she is surrounded by 7 angels.

 On the threshold/dehleez/entrance of the groom’s house, the bride should take her first step and recite verse no 29 of surah mu’minoon (given below) and ask hajat/duas as those 7 angels say amen to her duas. It is much recommended that instead of wasting this precious opportunity in fun/merry making/rituals e.t.c.,full time should be given to the bride to pray for one and all, as her doas are accepted during this time.

HOLY QURAN(23:29)

وَقُل رَّبِّ أَنزِلْنِي مُنزَلًا مُّبَارَكًا وَأَنتَ خَيْرُ الْمُنزِلِينَ

And say: "O my Lord! enable me to disembark with thy blessing: for Thou art the Best to enable (us) to disembark

In this ayah the bride is asking Allah: ‘You have placed me on this earth, so make this earth full of barakah for me’. Thereafter she should ask for her hajaat, asking Allah to bless this new life with barakah and rahma. Her dua is inshAllah guaranteed to be kabul as 7 angels go with the bride to her new home.

NOTE: It is very important that after nikaah, the bride should be bought to the groom’s house for the above purpose to be fulfilled and maximum advantage be taken of this highly blessed period.

POINT TO BE NOTED: The entrance to the home of the lovers of the ahlul bayt is just as important as the place at which the pray their salaat, when leaving the house to go for an important task e.g. job interview, exams – recite ziyarat-e-waritha at the door step before leaving)

FOOD FOR THOUGHT: It is said that Lady Fatima a.s after reaching the threshold of Imam Ali’s house spent so much time praying and crying, that at last Imam Ali had to request her to enter inside.

 When the groom sees the bride for the first time, he should place his hand on her forehead and recite Ayatul Qursi and the four Quls.

 It is then recommended for the groom to wash the feet of the bride. The reason why this is done is because; the girl before her nikaah is her father’s amanat, and after nikaah, becomes her husband’s amanat. But in the period between this change of waly ahad, Allah makes her His guest. This is a GREAT honour and therefore the groom has to wash her feet as she holds such a high status after having been the guest of Allah.As mentioned previously this water should be sprinkled around the house as 70,000 problems are removed and 70,000 blessings given.



NIKAAH NIGHT:

 This is a very blessed night for the bride and groom and according to hadith of our Aimmah it is recommended to spend this whole night in worship.

 The following aamal are recommended during this night apart from the 2 rakaats the bride and groom recite with doa at the end, which is present in the Islamic books on marriage (see doas vol three part one).

 Namaaz of Imame zamana should be recited together by the couple with full trust and faith and then by turns the spouses should ask for doas and the other should say AMEEN.

 Recommended doas:

• Asking for protection of ones faith/Iman.

• Ask for protection of ones progeny/kids to be upright in faith/Iman.

• Ask Almighty to grace their marriage with understanding e.t.c

• Ask for help in being merciful towards ones parents and ask for help in fulfilling their rights and remaining dutiful towards them.


• Ask for themselves and their progeny to be from the helpers of Imame zamana.
e.t.c, e.t.c.
 After the above salaat, ziyarate aashura should be recited by the couple.


FOOD FOR THOUGHT:
The day after their marriage, when Prophet Muhammad (pbuh), asks the commander of faithful, Imam Ali ibn Abi Taleb (pbuh), "How did you find your spouse?" Imam Ali ibn Abi Taleb (pbuh) does not waste a split second and answers immediately "the best companion and helper in obeying and worshiping Allah (SWT)." This is how the personality of Fatimah Zahra (pbuh) is presented in the view of Imam Ali ibn Abi Taleb (pbuh), at the first night of their marriage.

NOTE: As we know and experience that every aspect of life has its ups and downs, hard times and good times e.t.c and MARRIAGE IS NO EXCEPTION, but by acting on the above recommendations the couple will be able to stand firm in face of the problems/troubles which come in their married life and overcome them and strengthen their marriage ties instead of resorting to divorce in petty matters as seen with most of the marriages today.

Lets not waste this highly blessed opportunity which comes only once in our lifetime.

Lets not exchange these heavenly blessings for the petty rituals and customs which have become a MUST in our marriages.
''The worst sin is that which the commiter takes lightly.''[saying of Imam Ali a.s. quoted in Nahjul Balagha]
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Reyhana
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Re: RECOMMENDED ACTS IN ISLAMIC MARRIAGE

Postby Reyhana » 05 Mar 2012, 18:15

Zakira Zainab aapa sent me the verse which was missing under the title ''DURING RUKHSATI" and I have already posted it.

My sincere request to whoever reads this post:
Kindly forward this page link to all your relatives/friends e.t.c who are going to get married so they can act on these recommended acts to ensure manifold blessings in their married life.
''The worst sin is that which the commiter takes lightly.''[saying of Imam Ali a.s. quoted in Nahjul Balagha]

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