Should a man marry more then one wife at a time?

The decision to marry is one of great importance. How early should this decision be made? How early is too early? And everythign else about marriage

Do you agree to polygamous marriage?

Yes (married man)
1
9%
Yes (married woman)
2
18%
No (married man)
0
No votes
No (married woman)
0
No votes
Yes (bachelor)
2
18%
Yes (spinster)
2
18%
No (bachelor)
1
9%
No (spinster)
2
18%
Not sure until I get married then can decide!
1
9%
 
Total votes: 11
Fatimah Zahra Karim
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Re: Should a man marry more then one wife at a time?

Postby Fatimah Zahra Karim » 11 Feb 2011, 03:39

qamar wrote:if only under some circumstances a man is allowed to marry more than one wife then this shud be mentioned clearly by mawlanas but i have never heard anything like that

The maulanas are male and therefore, biased. Get a female "maulana" and she'll tell you. :P Jokes aside, I think the Quran, ahadith and Sunnah of the Masoomeen (pbut) have already specified the conditions as mentioned above.

sadika wrote:Can anyone relly luv n care 4 4 women equally? Like luv each one as much as the other?

Interestingly, the Quran answers this question when it talks about doing justice to the wives. The answer (from the Quran 4:129) is NO, a man can't love and care for all his wives equally no matter how hard he tries. The only requirement is that the man treat his wives equally even if he does not feel the same about them, which is very very hard for a regular human being.
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qamar
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Re: Should a man marry more then one wife at a time?

Postby qamar » 11 Feb 2011, 15:59

can you quote a hadeeth that states that a man cannot marry more than one wife for his own pleasure?

Ah, so it is allowed to marry 4 wives even though it is clear that emotionally man will not love them equally, but has to be just.

Problem solved.
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Muhammad Mahdi
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Re: Should a man marry more then one wife at a time?

Postby Muhammad Mahdi » 11 Feb 2011, 19:35

[Shakir 4:3] And if you fear that you cannot act equitably towards orphans, then marry such women as seem good to you, two and three and four; but if you fear that you will not do justice (between them), then (marry) only one or what your right hands possess; this is more proper, that you may not deviate from the right course.


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Re: Should a man marry more then one wife at a time?

Postby abuali » 17 Feb 2011, 00:11

[Shakir 4:3] And if you fear that you cannot act equitably towards orphans, then marry such women as seem good to you, two and three and four; but if you fear that you will not do justice (between them), then (marry) only one or what your right hands possess; this is more proper, that you may not deviate from the right course.
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Re: Should a man marry more then one wife at a time?

Postby abuali » 17 Feb 2011, 00:18

The above aya is clearly giving permission to man to marry up to 4 wives. The rules that a man has to abide by if he marries more than one wife are then stated. An then the condition under which man should avoid marrying more than one wife are also stated.

Those more knowledgable in fiqh please correct me if I am wrong: one principal in fiqh that I have heard of is that if te Holy Quran or ahadeeth have not prohibited something that that thing is permissible.

Based on the above a man marrying more than one wife for any reason is permitted unless that reason is prohibited by Quran or ahadith
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Re: Should a man marry more then one wife at a time?

Postby Muhammad Mahdi » 17 Feb 2011, 04:07

Permissible and recommended have two different meanings.

Just because something is allowed doesn'y mean we should do it.

Don't you agree?
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Re: Should a man marry more then one wife at a time?

Postby abuali » 17 Feb 2011, 13:15

Not only is it permissible it is recommended by action of the aimmah
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Re: Should a man marry more then one wife at a time?

Postby abuali » 17 Feb 2011, 13:15

if it is permissible then why should we stop it from being done?
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Re: Should a man marry more then one wife at a time?

Postby Muhammad Mahdi » 17 Feb 2011, 20:57

hasin wrote:Not only is it permissible it is recommended by action of the aimmah


Which brings me to my earlier statment that the later Imams had fewer wives.


if it is permissible then why should we stop it from being done?


It is permissible to eat shrimp. Does that mean we should encourage it?
And if eating shrimp carried a risk( such as marrying more wives and being just) why would you want to take that risk?

PS: Forgive my shrimp example, I guess I am hungry :biggrin:
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Re: Should a man marry more then one wife at a time?

Postby qamar » 20 Feb 2011, 21:27

I heard in majlis that 11th imam had many slave girls/wives
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Re: Should a man marry more then one wife at a time?

Postby qamar » 20 Feb 2011, 21:28

Shrimp is allowed? Dint knw

if allowed why not encourge it?
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Re: Should a man marry more then one wife at a time?

Postby Muhammad Mahdi » 21 Feb 2011, 03:39

qamar wrote:I heard in majlis that 11th imam had many slave girls/wives


I guess you probably heard this in a mullah chopris majlis.
Probably wrong about the wife.

Imam barely had time to marry one wife.


if allowed why not encourge it?

As I said, permissible and recommended are 2 different things.

Wearing jeans and shirt for men is permissible. Would you tell the mawlana to recite in the majlis that everybody should wear jeans?
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Re: Should a man marry more then one wife at a time?

Postby abuali » 21 Feb 2011, 07:27

qamar wrote:I heard in majlis that 11th imam had many slave girls/wives


Thats a good point.

I have also read about several slave girls in books. I guess since slave girls are 'wives' as per Islamic law, the same applies.

Muhammad Mahdi wrote:Imam barely had time to marry one wife.

Which one?

Muhammad Mahdi wrote:As I said, permissible and recommended are 2 different things.


Like I said, we can prove this is a recommended act that has been encouraged and practiced by the Holy Prophet (pbuh) and the Aimmah (as).

Muhammad Mahdi wrote:Which brings me to my earlier statment that the later Imams had fewer wives.

Can you state how many wives each Imam had (with a source) to prove your claim?
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Re: Should a man marry more then one wife at a time?

Postby abuali » 21 Feb 2011, 07:34

Fatimah Zahra Karim wrote:Well, anyone who thinks the Masumeen (pbut) married more than one wife for pleasure is sorely mistaken and has not understood these great personalities! Who in their right mind thinks the Prophet (saww) wanted to marry Aisha or Hafsa? Who thinks Imam Muhammad Taqi (as) wanted to marry mamoon's daughter?


Today people also marry for various reasons. Some reasons that I can think of are Prestige, Money, Social Status, to have children etc etc. Physical pleasure however is part and parcel of any marriage.

Fatimah Zahra Karim wrote:The 1st wife is to satisfy your physical desires. This is proved by the fact that if an unmarried person commits zinah, the punishment according to shariah is 100 lashes, while if a married person commits the same sin, the punishment is death by stoning.


The above point proves otherwise. Does the above rule differentiate between the man who has married one wife or more than one wife? If it does not then it means that pleasure is allowable in all his marriages, not only the first.

Fatimah Zahra Karim wrote:There are, of course, situations under which a man may marry more than one such as:
1. Infertility of the woman, such as Prophet Ibrahim (pbuh) marrying B. Hajra. (with IVF and other such progresses, true infertility incurable by medical means should be rare in our community)
2. To take care of widows and orphans, as mentioned in the verse quoted by Hasin.


Fatimah Zahra Karim wrote:Most men who marry other wives marry unwed younger girls just for the heck of it. Not widows or slaves like the Aimmah (pbut) used to!


Can you give references to shariah where more than one wife is only allowed in the above circumstance. Can you point us to the law in jurisprudence books that disallows a second wife who is an unmarried spinster but not an orphan?

Fatimah Zahra Karim wrote:Please demonstrate with examples from history when the Masumeen (pbut) married extra wives for pleasure as that is what we're trying to justify in the name of Islam here.


All the Aimmah (as) who married more than one wife gave their wives their rights. Which includes husband-wife relationship.
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Re: Should a man marry more then one wife at a time?

Postby Muhammad Mahdi » 21 Feb 2011, 13:05

hasin wrote:
Muhammad Mahdi wrote:Imam barely had time to marry one wife.

Which one?


The Imam was in prison most of his life. He had only one wife Narjis.

Hasini wrote:
Like I said, we can prove this is a recommended act that has been encouraged and practiced by the Holy Prophet (pbuh) and the Aimmah (as).

Muhammad Mahdi wrote:Which brings me to my earlier statment that the later Imams had fewer wives.

Can you state how many wives each Imam had (with a source) to prove your claim?


Wives of Imam

Imam Ali
1. Fatima - Hassan, Husayn, Zainab, Umm kulthum
2.Khawla bint Jafar ibn Qays al Hanafi
3.Umm Habib bint Rabi'a
4. Fatima binte Hizam ibn Khalid ibn Darim (this fatima is also known as ummul banin)
5. Laila bint Masud al darimi -
6. Asma bint Umays al Khath'ami -
7. Umm Sa'id bint Urwa ibn Masud al Thaqafi
8. Some children but mother names not mentioned in Kitab al Irshad

Imam Hassan

1. Umm Bashir bint Abu masud Uqba ibn Amr ibn Tha'laba al Khazraji
2.Khawla bint Manzur al Fazari
3. Umm Farwa Umar, Al Qasim, Abdallah
5. Umm Ishaq bint Talha ibn Ubaydallah al Taymi
6. Some children but mother names not mentioned in Kitab al Irshad

Imam Husayn
1. Shahzanan, daughter of King Choesroe Yazdigard
2. Laila bint Abu murra ibn Urwa, ibn Masun al thaqafi
3. Women from the tribe of Quda'a, name unknown - m/o Jafar, who died during lifetime of Imam Husayn
4. Umm rabab
5. Umm Ishaq bint Talha ibn Ubaydallah of Taym

Imam Sajjad
1. Fatima bint Hassan ibn Ali ibn Abu talib, also known as Umm abdullah
2. Unknown name - m/o Abdullah, Hassan, Husayn
3. Unknown name - m/o Zayd, Umar
4. Unknown name - m/o Husayn, abd al rahman, Sulayman, Ali, Khadija,
5. Unknown name - m/o Muhammad
6. Unknown name - m/o Fatima, Aliyya, Umm kulthum

Imam Muhammad Baqir
1. Umme Farwa, daughter of Qasim ibn Muhammad ibn Abu bakr -
2. Umm Hakim bint Asid ibn Al mughira al thaqafi
3. Unknown name -m/o Ali, Zaynab
4. Unknown name - m/o Umm Salama

Imam Jafar Sadiq
1. Fatima bint Husayn ibn Ali ibn Husayn - Ismail, Abdullah, Umm Farwa
2. Hamida Khatoon - Imam Musa, Ishaq, Muhammad
3. Some children but mother names not mentioned

Imam Musa Kazim had 37 children!
1. Hazrat Bibi Najma - Imam Reza, Ibrahim, Abbas, Qasim
2. Unknown name - Ismail, Jafar, Harun, Hassan
3. Unknown name - Ahmad, Muhammad, Hamza
4. Some children but mother names not mentioned

Imam Reza
1.Bibi Khaizran - Imam Jawad

Imam Jawad
Children
1.Bibi Samana
2. Some children but mother names not mentioned


Imam Hadi
Children
1.Bibi Saleel
2. Some children but mother names not mentioned

Imam Hassan Askari
Bibi Narjis Khatoon


Analyze the trend. It is clear to me the later Imams had only 1 or 2 wives while the earlier ones had upto 6.
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