Islam Vs Culture who proposes

The decision to marry is one of great importance. How early should this decision be made? How early is too early? And everythign else about marriage
minhaal2000
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Islam Vs Culture who proposes

Postby minhaal2000 » 05 Dec 2007, 21:02

it was queit astonishing when I came across this and thought i'd share it with you

islamically the women are required to offer their hand in marriage to the men

proof

abu bakr proposed so many times and pleaded to the prophet so he could get married to Bibi Fatema. but the prophet saww offered fatema to Imam Ali when the Star came down to his house

It was Bibi Khadija that offered to get married to the Holy Prophet not the other way round

in the nikaah seremony it is the bride that offers the hand and the groom who says I accept three times

what you say??

I think iv pushed the wrong button
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qarrar
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Re: Islam Vs Culture who proposes

Postby qarrar » 11 Dec 2007, 01:49

All that you have mentioned above is correct (Note I am not verifying your quoted hadiths). The problem in our khoja society is that we are still dearly clinging to our Indian past hence the women seldom proposes. But that could be an unfair statement because I am not aware that this practice is even given effect to in Arab societies!
How does he, whose guardian is Allah, get perished? And how can he, who is being pursued by Allah, get salvation? (Imam Mohammad Taqi (as))
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abuali
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Re: Islam Vs Culture who proposes

Postby abuali » 12 Jan 2008, 01:59

Dear Brother Minhaal and Qarrar

I think we may have a slight misunderstanding of what Islam wants from us here

The following can maybe be logical reasons why its the man who should propose and the woman who should accept or reject

The woman is created with a lot more haya than the man is.

Notice how, Imam Ali (AS) was encouraged to ask for the hand of Bibi Fatema (AS) in marriage

Also, it was the Holy Prophet who proposed marriage to Bibi Khadija

(Could you perhaps look for references for the hadiths you had quoted and I shall do likewise for mine)

It is in the interest of the harmony of society that the man proposes and that the woman has the right to accept or reject.

Showing interest in a pious man or woman (mostly indirectly) usually via family and relatives is a good way of rolling the ball.

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